This post originally started as an irate FB post. I removed the post
and gave some thought to what had happened to me. That post became
fodder for a blog entry.
I have been coming to this island for over 30 years, since I was a kid.
I've lived here, this time, for over 10 years and I'm still amazed and somewhat saddened that I'm STILL thought of as an outside, a foreigner. I'm not talking about walking down Front Street and being mistaken for a tourist. I'm talking about my day to day life. I can frequent a shop weekly for years and still be seen as an outsider. I can offer conversation about the government, local happenings, etc, and still not be consider a 'local' by the locals.
I recently went to a fast food restaurant to have lunch and enjoy the airco and WiFi. It's something I do an a nearly weekly basis. My guilty pleasure. It was a scorching hot day and I needed to seek refuge from the heat. Once I stepped inside I let out a long sigh of relief as the cold air hit me. Bliss. I greeted the staff with the usual broad grin and 'Good Afternoon' that was happily returned, ordered my meal and found a comfortable spot away form the general hustle and bustle of the restaurant. I happily began enjoying my lunch and unpacked my laptop.
After about 10 minutes I was aware that the crowd noise seemed to be louder than usual in the restaurant. I looked up from my laptop to glance around. There was a woman with her gaggle of children sitting 2 tables away from me. There were a least 6 kids. I'm not sure if they were all hers, but that was the impression I got. The kids ranged in age from about 5 to 12. The younger ones were in the play area set up for kids, having a grand old time. In fact, some of their antics were making me chuckle. Seems a pecking order had been established by a young girl of about 3. She was bossy and didn't take NO for an answer. Her braids, with pink beads at the ends, bounced furiously as she barked out orders. The older kids obeyed her without questions. Was cute to see her directing them. On occasion the kids would trickle out to grab a sip of soda or a bite to eat before being herded back to the play area by the little general to continue having fun. I turned back to my lunch and laptop.
Less than 5 minutes passed before an ear splitting shriek sounded out across the restaurant. Seems the 2 oldest kids were in a squabble. A girl of about 12, who was dressed like something out of the local brothels had decided to tease her younger brother, of about 9, by taking his food. It was the boy who had let out the glass shattering scream as he began chasing his sister around the restaurant like a rampaging rhino, pushing chairs & bumping into tables. The ruckus rolled to a stop at the booth directly behind me, but the sound level did not stop, it intensified. I drew in an annoyed breath and muttered, For God sake, SHUT UP, under my breath. With a shake of my head I focused back on my laptop.
From the booth behind me I heard a loud teeth suck and the girl stated rather loudly: White people just have no manners and are rude. My spine stiffened at the insolent comment and my jaw clenched. I promptly twisted around in my chair to pin the 'child' with a glare and said forcefully. "You're running around in a restaurant screaming and carrying on like a 2 year old & you say I'm being rude. So sorry. Will you PLEASE shut the hell up." As I turned back around this little chit states in a loud voice that just because I'm white I think i can be rude. This mule of a girl then gets up, comes to stand next to my table and proceeds to start a rant about how white people come down on black people and that white people think they are all better than blacks & white people think they're so smart...All this because of being told to shut up...She is making an effort to wind herself up and she's looking around to see who is paying attention to her asinine rant. Only her mother was looking on but silent. When the girl stopped to draw a breath I simply shrugged and stated: Manners, Race & Stupidity are 3 different issues. Race has nothing to do with the fact that you're just simply rude and displaying your stupidity. My comment received a few quick smiles from nearby tables of locals and visitors alike. It also brought the girl up short, mouth open like a fish gasping for air. She snapped her mouth shut. It was at this point that her mother got up, gathered the rest of her brood and shuffled them out of the restaurant. From what I gathered from the staff after the group left, they had apparently been sitting in the restaurant for quite some time, making a nuisance of themselves, talking rudely to the staff and making comments about the manager and other diners, etc.
It's not so much the lack of manners that is shocking, but the ignorance that accompanied it. For a young person to blurt out racial comments and imply oppression without any true understanding is shameful. The words this girl was spewing was obviously ideas she was parroting from her mother/guardian. I find these ideas to be a common sentiment among the locals. They constantly refer to their history of slavery and seem to fall upon that or use it as a crutch whenever something doesn't go their way. A decision doesn't go in their favor and many are quick to claim 'repression' or race. I just want to point out that, realistically, we're ALL foreigners here. No matter if you're 'born here' or not. The ancestors of all the 'locals' were brought over in the slave trade. Sad, but indeed a fact. Unless your family tree can be traced back to Arawak or Caribe Indians, you're a foreigner, too. Parents don't seem to realize this as they nurture their own hate through their children. Parents are the 1st/last/ONLY line of defense for their child/children. When young, children parrot their parents, it's a natural learning process. So when you think your child is too young, or doesn't understand, you may be right, but that won't stop them from spewing the same things you say. So if you talk about racism or hate, you're giving those sentiments to your offspring to mimic. By the time they are old enough to even understand what they;re saying, the seed of hate has been planted. As a parent you must be the one to decide whether or not to let that seed grow.
Hate breeds hate.
I have been coming to this island for over 30 years, since I was a kid.
I've lived here, this time, for over 10 years and I'm still amazed and somewhat saddened that I'm STILL thought of as an outside, a foreigner. I'm not talking about walking down Front Street and being mistaken for a tourist. I'm talking about my day to day life. I can frequent a shop weekly for years and still be seen as an outsider. I can offer conversation about the government, local happenings, etc, and still not be consider a 'local' by the locals.
I recently went to a fast food restaurant to have lunch and enjoy the airco and WiFi. It's something I do an a nearly weekly basis. My guilty pleasure. It was a scorching hot day and I needed to seek refuge from the heat. Once I stepped inside I let out a long sigh of relief as the cold air hit me. Bliss. I greeted the staff with the usual broad grin and 'Good Afternoon' that was happily returned, ordered my meal and found a comfortable spot away form the general hustle and bustle of the restaurant. I happily began enjoying my lunch and unpacked my laptop.
After about 10 minutes I was aware that the crowd noise seemed to be louder than usual in the restaurant. I looked up from my laptop to glance around. There was a woman with her gaggle of children sitting 2 tables away from me. There were a least 6 kids. I'm not sure if they were all hers, but that was the impression I got. The kids ranged in age from about 5 to 12. The younger ones were in the play area set up for kids, having a grand old time. In fact, some of their antics were making me chuckle. Seems a pecking order had been established by a young girl of about 3. She was bossy and didn't take NO for an answer. Her braids, with pink beads at the ends, bounced furiously as she barked out orders. The older kids obeyed her without questions. Was cute to see her directing them. On occasion the kids would trickle out to grab a sip of soda or a bite to eat before being herded back to the play area by the little general to continue having fun. I turned back to my lunch and laptop.
Less than 5 minutes passed before an ear splitting shriek sounded out across the restaurant. Seems the 2 oldest kids were in a squabble. A girl of about 12, who was dressed like something out of the local brothels had decided to tease her younger brother, of about 9, by taking his food. It was the boy who had let out the glass shattering scream as he began chasing his sister around the restaurant like a rampaging rhino, pushing chairs & bumping into tables. The ruckus rolled to a stop at the booth directly behind me, but the sound level did not stop, it intensified. I drew in an annoyed breath and muttered, For God sake, SHUT UP, under my breath. With a shake of my head I focused back on my laptop.
From the booth behind me I heard a loud teeth suck and the girl stated rather loudly: White people just have no manners and are rude. My spine stiffened at the insolent comment and my jaw clenched. I promptly twisted around in my chair to pin the 'child' with a glare and said forcefully. "You're running around in a restaurant screaming and carrying on like a 2 year old & you say I'm being rude. So sorry. Will you PLEASE shut the hell up." As I turned back around this little chit states in a loud voice that just because I'm white I think i can be rude. This mule of a girl then gets up, comes to stand next to my table and proceeds to start a rant about how white people come down on black people and that white people think they are all better than blacks & white people think they're so smart...All this because of being told to shut up...She is making an effort to wind herself up and she's looking around to see who is paying attention to her asinine rant. Only her mother was looking on but silent. When the girl stopped to draw a breath I simply shrugged and stated: Manners, Race & Stupidity are 3 different issues. Race has nothing to do with the fact that you're just simply rude and displaying your stupidity. My comment received a few quick smiles from nearby tables of locals and visitors alike. It also brought the girl up short, mouth open like a fish gasping for air. She snapped her mouth shut. It was at this point that her mother got up, gathered the rest of her brood and shuffled them out of the restaurant. From what I gathered from the staff after the group left, they had apparently been sitting in the restaurant for quite some time, making a nuisance of themselves, talking rudely to the staff and making comments about the manager and other diners, etc.
It's not so much the lack of manners that is shocking, but the ignorance that accompanied it. For a young person to blurt out racial comments and imply oppression without any true understanding is shameful. The words this girl was spewing was obviously ideas she was parroting from her mother/guardian. I find these ideas to be a common sentiment among the locals. They constantly refer to their history of slavery and seem to fall upon that or use it as a crutch whenever something doesn't go their way. A decision doesn't go in their favor and many are quick to claim 'repression' or race. I just want to point out that, realistically, we're ALL foreigners here. No matter if you're 'born here' or not. The ancestors of all the 'locals' were brought over in the slave trade. Sad, but indeed a fact. Unless your family tree can be traced back to Arawak or Caribe Indians, you're a foreigner, too. Parents don't seem to realize this as they nurture their own hate through their children. Parents are the 1st/last/ONLY line of defense for their child/children. When young, children parrot their parents, it's a natural learning process. So when you think your child is too young, or doesn't understand, you may be right, but that won't stop them from spewing the same things you say. So if you talk about racism or hate, you're giving those sentiments to your offspring to mimic. By the time they are old enough to even understand what they;re saying, the seed of hate has been planted. As a parent you must be the one to decide whether or not to let that seed grow.
Hate breeds hate.
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